Looking ahead

So next year will brings cheers and tears all together for me.  First the good news - 
Albemarle County has committed to a minimum of 1 full time counselor in every school next year. That means that both Red Hill and Murray will have the benefit of a counselor in the building every day.  But of course that also means I cannot stay at both schools.  I am looking forward to building on my program at Murray and being a bigger part of the day to day life there.

But at the same time it is with a heavy heart that I say farewell to Red Hill. After 17 years at Red Hill, I have come to know your families as an extension of my own. Many of you, parents, were once my students – not just here at Red Hill, but Yancey too. Between the 2 schools, I have spent the last 25 years with your families. The hundreds of relationships over those years have had a profound impact on me professionally and personally. I have laughed, cried, struggled, and celebrated with you together. This community will always hold a special place in my heart.

Ari Zlotnik will be joining you next year. She comes with new energy and enthusiasm for building relationships with your kids and I know I leave you in very capable hands. With love, I wish every one of you the very best and know I intend to keep tabs on the very bright futures of all my Moos!

To my Mustangs, have an amazing summer - rest and re-charge. I can't wait to see you all back in August!

5-6 Transition

It will be hard to believe for many of you but your 5^th graders elementary career is coming to an end.  The last quarter holds many emotions for us as we fondly recall how they have grown and bloomed and will take great pride as they make that final walk to accept their certificates and become Middle Schoolers. At the same time we can’t help but be nervous wondering: Will they do OK? Will they make friends? Are they in the right classes?

The students themselves are nervous and excited about what is ahead of them.  As they toured their new school last month they began to think about new freedoms, marvel over all the new club and activity opportunities, and even get excited about new lunch options.  They’ll also worry about lockers, bigger schools, more teachers, and changing friends. 

I absolutely love this time.  I love the palpable excitement in the air.  I love watching them become young adults right in front of our eyes.  I love watching them discover themselves.  The last quarter of Guidance in 5^th grade is truly my favorite lessons that I do. Now that they have seen Henley and Walton, we’ll begin talking about all the things that are starting to engage their minds.  We’ll talk about switching classes, learning schedules, getting involved, dressing out for PE, lockers, and friends.

The 2 activities they usually love the most are lock practice and web hunts.  Opening a lock is a universal worry for most 5^th graders.  I bring in a set of locks and we will practice until that is one worry they can check off their list.  I also pose a set of questions or information about their new school as a scavenger hunt on the Middle School’s web site.  They get to discover mascots, colors, teacher names, events, and more by browsing for the answers.

I encourage you to ask if you have any questions about your future Middle School.  I and the MS counselors are all happy to help! Here is their contact info:

Henley 434-823-4393
6^th Grade counselor: Kimberly Warnick, ext.51093, kwarnick@k12albemarle.org

Walton 434-977-6533
6^th Grade Counselor: Doug Bloor, ext. 54021, dbloor@k12albemarle.org

Walton counselors will also be visiting the Red Hill 5th graders, along with Mr. Walton (principal) and some current 6th graders on May 28th.

Test Taking 101

      As SOL’s approach the anxiety levels generally seem to rise (and not just for the kids).  We have been doing some small groups with kids that might need some confidence boosters at test time.  We are working on strategies for reducing anxiety and building confidence.  With 3^rd graders being introduced to SOLs for the first time, their anxiety is a little different.  Anytime you do something for the first time nerves tend to be present, but when you hear people around you building up the SOL, its hard not to worry about it.  
     One of the first things I do is debunk the myths – no, SOLs are not used to decide if you go to 4^th grade – no, SOLs are not on your report card – and no, the sky will not fall down if you get a question wrong.  OK, the last one may be a bit of an exaggeration; but, they really do worry about what happens because the test just feels different.  I try to normalize the experience for them.  We talk about how tests are part of life.  We take them all the time – and not always in school (like a drivers license test).  The purpose of a test is to show what you know (not – what you don’t) and to determine whether you are ready for what’s next.  I share with them how teachers look at the results and make decisions regarding what new instruction, extra help, and levels they need for the next school year.     One of my favorite stories to read with 3^rd graders is Hooray for Diffendoofer Day!, by Dr. Seuss.  In the book a group of students (and a very sad principal) are worried about an upcoming test their whole school has to take.  The teacher tells them:

“Don’t Fret!

You’ve learned the things you need

To pass that test and many more –

I’m certain that You’ll succeed.

We’ve taught you that the earth is round,

That red and white make pink,

And something that matters more –

We’ve taught you how to think.”

That guides our follow up conversations that you probably know more than you think you do and if you take your time, keep your cool, and use your head – you can figure anything out.  Of course the kids in the book get the highest score possible.

I’ve included some testing tips for both kids and parents here:

Parent Tips for helping your child do his/her best and reducing Test Anxiety 1. Make sure your child gets plenty of rest - especially the night before testing – and has a healthy breakfast. Eggs, yogurt, oatmeal, apples, and berries are all great brain foods. It is also important for your child to drink plenty of water. 2. Make sure your child attends school regularly. The more effort and energy a child puts into learning, the more likely he/she will do well on tests. 3. Provide a comfortable place at home for studying. Everyone studies in a different way, so allow your child to try out different spaces to see what works best for him/her. 4. Remind your child - and yourself - that this is just one test, and that tests are designed to show what you do and don’t know, so it’s OK if they don’t know everything! Many things can influence how your child does on a test; so one test does not describe their abilities. 5. Encourage your child to take his/her time and to not get discouraged about hard questions. Some questions will be tough, but the next one might be easy! Like Dory says, “Just keep swimming!” 6. The pressure to pass and fear of failing can seriously increase your child’s anxiety. Be aware of what messages you are giving him/her about passing and failing. 7. If your child is anxious, try practicing relaxation techniques with him/her. This website has different strategies you can try: http://youth.anxietybc.com/relaxation 8. If your child is eligible for testing accommodations, make sure you know, and your child knows what those accommodations are. 9. Communicate with your child’s teachers regularly. Ask them to suggest activities for you and your child to do at home to help prepare for tests and improve your child's understanding of schoolwork. 10. Praise your child for what they do well. Everyone has strengths and helping them see their strengths can increase your child’s confidence about their abilities. The standards and last year’s test items, as well as resources, are available on the DOE web site at: http://www.pen.k12.va.us/students_parents/

Test Taking Strategies for Kids “Jail the Detail” - Highlight or underline or circle details in the questions. Why?: Because it helps me focus on exactly what the question is asking. “Be Slick and Predict”- Predict or guess what I think the answer might be BEFORE I ever read the choices. Why?: Because sometimes I can guess the answer, but if my guess is wrong then I can guess again. “Slash the Trash” - Read ALL choices, MARK OUT the ones that I KNOW are WRONG, then choose my answer from the one or ones that are left over.  Why?:Because marking out the choices that I know are wrong allows me to see the    choices left and I know the right answer is one of those left over. “Plug it In – Plug it In” - Once I choose my answer, I will plug it in and make sure it makes sense. USE THIS especially with vocabulary questions.   Why?: When I have a sentence and I have to choose the correct vocabulary word,  if I will read the sentence with each choice word, this will help me choose the word that makes the most sense. “Be Smart with Charts” & “Zap the Maps” - Look and read ALL information on the MAP or CHART before answering any of the questions. Why?: Because charts and maps provide a lot of information that I will need to answer some of the questions, so it is important to know the information that they show.   “Extra Extra – Read all About it” - If the directions say READ, then I will READ. Pay close attention to the important word. Why?: It is always important to follow the directions and ALWAYS read the directions carefully. Just like a recipe to make a cake, my directions are my test recipe so I know what to do. “ Keep on Keeping On” -  If I get to a couple of questions that I just don’t know.  Don’t give up! Keep on going. “If you Snooze You Lose!” - DO NOT leave any question BLANK! I will not have any chance of Getting it RIGHT! If I USE THESE STRATEGIES MY CHANCES OF PASSING THE TEST ARE MUCH BETTER!!!! AND  Don’t forget to take Deep Breaths & Blow out Slowly It Relaxes My BODY & BRAIN!!!!

Personal Safety Unit

Kindergartners at both schools are engaged in our safety unit.  This is always one of those units that is so crucial and yet a little touchy.  When I watch the sad news stories about missing kids or see another Amber alert on my devices, I am reminded that even though these conversations can be hard or even uncomfortable, they are so important.  

Many of the students learn about personal space during PE classes. I expand on that by teaching they have 4 different personal spaces. That becomes the foundation for each of the subsequent lessons. The four spaces are also briefly reviewed in 1st and 2nd grade.

 We begin with stranger space.  The stranger space is 2 arm lengths. Students demonstrate that by stretching their arm out in front of them.  The challenge here is giving students a healthy respect for danger, but not scaring them into a fear of public places.  I stress that there are lots of good people in the world and just a few bad people (or scoopers).  The problem is that you can’t tell by looking at someone if they are good or not so you have to be careful with everyone just in case.  I share the book, Scoop, by Julia Cook with them.  In the book they learn that no one can scoop you if they can’t reach you.  That means we just keep a safe distance from people you don’t know.  We don’t have to be scared or run away or scream, just keep far enough away they can’t touch you.  And if a stranger steps toward you, then you simply step back.  We also learn about call lists and never going anywhere with anyone you weren’t expecting without checking with someone on your call list.  I also touch on other ways we can come in contact with strangers like the computer or phone.  We talk about the importance of never giving out personal information like your address or your name.

The next space is our friend space.  This is the space around us when we put our hands on our hips.  It’s close enough to read together, play games together, and have conversations, but not close enough to be uncomfortable.  This is the safe space for most of the people we know well. If we’re not sure, we can use the dinner rule.  Would my family have this person over for dinner? If yes, then they are probably a friend.  We review the stranger space and remember that if someone we don’t know steps toward our friend space we back up. 

The third space is our family space.  This is the space when we have are arms right next to us.  I also call this the snuggle space.  We talk about how it’s OK to snuggle up and watch a movie or give hugs and kisses to family, but we wouldn’t snuggle with our friends.  We practice some polite ways to let our friends know when they are in our family space.  Sometimes we just need to let them know they are in our space and it’s easily fixed.  But, if we ask and that person keeps getting too close or makes us uncomfortable we should let a grown up know.

The last space is our private space.  This is often where I get a few giggles because it’s the most uncomfortable to talk about but it’s so important that children know they have the right to say no!  I define this as the areas of your body covered by a bathing suit.  The kids demonstrate this space by giving themselves a hug.  I stress to the kids that when you’re little, a parent might help bathe you or change a diaper; and if you have a problem a doctor might need to see those areas.  But, otherwise no one has the right to be in those spaces except for you.  If someone is in your private spaces you should do 3 things: 1) Say no using your big voice, 2) Move away immediately, and 3) Tell a grown up you trust. We practice the big voice, which is a low and loud way to say no.  The big voice should sound really different than your play voice because it makes people look to see what’s going on.  They are never to use the big voice except in an emergency.  It’s not for the playground, but for those times when you really need someone to pay attention. 

Sadly, not all child assault or abduction cases are strangers so it’s important that children know that its OK to speak up if even if a known adult makes you uncomfortable.  We talk about trusting your instincts and listening to your uh-oh voice.  When you get that funny feeling and know something doesn’t feel right, it’s always Ok to say no and then immediately tell another grown up you trust.

Exploring Feelings

     So K-1 students are working on Feelings Awareness.  In Kindergarten we'll be focusing on vocabulary. Kids will often choose one of three feelings words to describe their emotions – Happy, Sad, or Mad.  And often, how they really feel is jealous, disappointed, or left out.  We are working hard to develop a vocabulary that helps them really describe what’s going on inside them.  And they love experimenting by using words like clever, blue, curious, irritated, and shocked.

 We will be reading a selection of books that expose them to different feelings vocabulary.  I'll be using the characters from the movie Inside Out to guide us in our discussions and lists.  We’ll also watch some video clips and do some fun activities.   One of the favorite activities I’ll be doing with the K’s later is the music activity where they get to decide how a piece of music feels and then move their bodies to demonstrate the mood.  They have a lot of fun – the budding dancers really get to show off!  And we get to talk about how we tend to move slower, faster, louder, etc. in response to our feelings.  We’ll also do a similar activity with color.

In first grade at Murray and 1-2 at Red Hill, we explore the more difficult feelings – the angry, upset, and fearful ones – we’ll also talk about strategies for dealing with them.   I will stress over and over all feelings are OK (it’s not bad to get angry), but it’s what you do with them that counts.  They love bubble breathing and using our sense of humor to combat new or scary situations.

Next week, we'll explore anger.  We talk about what happens in our brain and watch a video called "Just Breathe."  We discussed the importance of calming down before you try to problem solve. They had fun visualizing a jar of glitter while we practiced breathing, but more importantly they got to see how we all need different time and space to calm down. 

    

Growth Mindset

 

  Third and Fifth graders have been discussing a growth mindset vs. a "fixed" mindset during Core time.   We started with some brain basics.  We learned about neural pathways and synapses.  We even got to play with licorice when we looked at how those neural pathways get stronger and synapses get smaller the more we do something.  And we learned that our brains like challenges!  If things were always easy, our brains would fall asleep instead of growing and getting stronger. And if we never made a mistake, we couldn't learn something new!
 
      Next we talked about the "Power of Yet."  Adding the word yet, makes a powerful difference in our language and thinking.  Imagine the difference between "This is hard. I can't do it." and This is hard. I can't do it YET." We had fun with all kinds of brain games from word puzzles to picnic patterns as we looked at how our brains learn patterns when we stick with something.
   
     We also spent time talking about GRIT.  That's the combination of determination and resilience. We looked at strategies that help us push through challenges, like self talk.  And we even measured our grittiness.  We also talked about how everyone is unique and how our own strengths and flaws drive each person's grit in different ways.

Kelso's Choices

1st Graders at Murray and 3-4 kids at Red Hill are working on a unit on Kelso’s Choices.  Kelso is a pretty smart frog that teaches students the difference between big problems and small problems.  Big problems are those that are scary or recurring and should be shared with a grown-up they trust. Small problems are those that are more everyday problems that may cause you to feel irritated or annoyed.  Kelso encourages students to recognize they are smart enough and capable of handling many of these small problems on their own.  And then he shares 9 choices they have to do this.  I suggest that can try 2 of these before deciding they need to take it to a teacher (reminding them anything dangerous or uncomfortable should always go right to a grown up).

We'll discuss all nine choices and will be practicing them.  They are:

· Walk Away · Tell Them To Stop · Talk It Out · Make A Deal · Share and Take Turns

· Apologize · Wait and Cool Off · Go To Another Game · Ignore

School to Work Skills

     5^th graders are hard at work on a school to work skills unit.  I started by letting them know that they have a job right now not unlike the adults in their lives.  As a student they have specific tasks they are expected to carry out like every job in the work force. They are paid with grades and knowledge and even receive promotions like their occupational counterparts.  I have shared with them that there are essential skills that every worker should have no matter what kind of job they have, be it service worker, professional, athlete, or politician.  When they utilize these skills effectively they are productive and successful workers.

·         We started off with organization and did an activity that demonstrated there isn’t any right way to organize and that it can be very personal.  The important idea is that everything has a home and when you can find it easily you are more efficient. 

·         The second skill we did was focusing.  I also call it “tuning in.”  I compare their brains to a radio.  A radio can actually tune in to more than one station, but it’s hard to get all the information and really understand everything you are hearing.  We discussed strategies for helping your brain really tune in to the right station (teacher, math, piano practice, mom, etc.).  Then we played a game that has been one of their favorite activities so far.  It requires them to tune in to things happening around them and watch for a cue and then follow a set of directions.

·         Next we'll draw homework portraits that allow them to think about their homework habits.  We discussed how good workers make sure they have time for both work and play, but that they can also separate them to be able to do their best at work time.  We discussed best times for working, environment, and creating a work space.

·         Then we'll work on Time Management.  We’ll make schedules and do an activity that requires them to be plan a span of time and to also account for the unexpected.  We’ll talk about how “frontloading” a schedule can help them be ready for things that just come up.

·         We’ll finish with understanding yourself as a learner and a worker. We’ll do a color quiz where they will have to think about their preferences in work environments and their strengths.  They’ll discover tendencies about how they learn and also the environments they thrive in (working alone or in a group/ indoors or outdoors / with math, human services / science etc.)

Conflict Resolution

     Third graders at Murray have been working on a Conflict Resolution unit.  We started by talking about the importance of self control and making sure you are in control of your emotions first.  We studied the parts of our brain that react when we are angry.  If you want to be able to successfully think through a problem your wise owl needs to be on the nest (prefrontal cortex) and not your barking security dog (amygdale).

 Next we worked on I-messages as a way to respectfully start a conversation and then active listening to ensure both people get to speak and be heard.  We finished up with some practice in brainstorming.

CARES: Self-Control

February's theme is Self-Control.  Kindergartners had a blast trying to see if they could keep from jumping up to pop bubbles or avoid eating one marshmallow to earn 2!  We will also be reading a really fun book - My Mouth Is A Volcano.  Louis has a difficult time with erupting (interrupting) and learns some self control strategies to control his words.

In 1-2, we're talking about self control in regards to Peer Pressure.  Wagner finds himself in a tough spot when some of his classmates are encouraging him to make a bad choice.  He doesn't want to be left out, but he wants to do the right thing too.  Can he use self control and keep from going with the pressure?

Check out CM's thoughts on Self Control

3rd & 4th graders are looking at self -control with big emotions.  We talked about what happens in our brains when we are faced with stress or fear or frustration and why it's hard to be in control. But, we also talked about how our amazing bodies give us signals to warn us so we have time to make choices that help us stay in control.
5th graders are looking at self control and how it plays into their work habits - controlling distractions and setting priorities to meet responsibilities.

Too Good For Drugs

4th graders at both schools have just started a unit called Too Good for Drugs (TGFD).  All schools are required to have some sort of Drug Education program.  TGFD is the program that ACPS has adopted for our 4th graders.  This unit covers both School Counseling (EP8, EP9, EP10, EP11) and Health (4.2, 4.3) SOLs for 4^th grade.
      The goals of this program are 1. to develop some safety skills that help them make smart choices in uncomfortable or tempting situations; and 2. to have some background on what a drug is and why they can be dangerous.

     This can be an uncomfortable topic for both parents and students (giggling not uncommon).  I try hard to make the lessons engaging and enjoyable without undermining the seriousness of the topic. Here is an outline of the lessons and some notes on my "spin" on them.  I invite you to contact me at ANY time if you are unclear or unsure about any of these lessons.

1. Goal setting (having goals and things that matter to you give you reasons to make good choices)
2. Goal boosters/busters (make good choices about who you choose to spend time with)
3. Decision-Making (plan your actions, evaluate your choices and problem-solve using the steps for responsible decision-making.  Students will also discuss when decisions should be made alone or with the help of a responsible adult)
4. Managing Emotions (recognizing and managing emotions with healthy strategies)
5. Effective Communication (skills for resolving conflict, sharing ideas, and working cooperatively)
6. Relationships (healthy and unhealthy friendships)
7. Peer Pressure (what it is - why is effective and then 6 strategies to stand up to it)
8. Effects of Alcohol
9. Effects of Tobacco
10. Safe use of Over the Counter Medicines & Prescriptions

CARES: Empathy

January's theme  is Empathy. In the lower grades we've discussed how empathy is when you can imaging how someone else might feel or what it's like to be in their shoes.  Kindergartners loved watching the Sesame Street clip with Murray trying to figure out what it is (and his subsequent "Happy Dance").  We've watched clips from popular animated movies and looked for examples of empathy - like when Lightning McQueen gives up a win in the race to help his friend when he realizes he is hurt. We also played the game "How Would You Feel?"  In the upper grades, we've explored it through the lens of decision-making and how thinking about the consequences for both yourself and others can lead to better decisions for everyone.